


It's Only a Matter of Time

by bad_ash10



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Brief Dousy moments, Character Death, Episode: s07e09 As I Have Always Been, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Philindaisy feels, Post S7, Really more focused on Philindaisy, Team as Family, happy-ish ending, maybe a hopeful ending, spoilers for 7x09
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:29:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25499869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bad_ash10/pseuds/bad_ash10
Summary: "Time’s not fixed; we’re still together somewhere."
Relationships: Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson
Comments: 22
Kudos: 88





	It's Only a Matter of Time

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to @agentofmarvel084 for her fantastic beta-ing! Do yourself a favor and check out her fics after you read this one. I promise, you'll love her work!  
> \---------  
> Anybody else still crying after Enoch's line where he said this was their last mission together? Cause I am. 
> 
> For some reason I'm thinking the final episode will be similar to a Spy's Goodbye as they go their separate ways for safety reasons to protect one another and themselves. But JedMo have surprised me on many, many, many occasions, so I'm not counting on it lol!
> 
> But that being said, it inspired me to write this fic.
> 
> And when I tell y'all I cried SO MUCH while writing this... I. CRIED. SO. MUCH!

Daisy had sat lost in thought for what felt like forever, barely paying attention to her kids playing on the living room floor in front of her.

_It was him._

_It had to be him_.

She barely registered the sound of the kids squealing excitedly as their father came through the front door.

Daniel grabbed one of their kids in each of his arms and had spun them around several times, much to their delight, before he caught sight of Daisy’s strained face.

“Uh, Philip, May, why don’t you guys go work on your homework?” he suggested as he lowered them back to the floor. 

“Aww,” Philip whined as May said stubbornly, “But we don’t want to, Daddy!” 

Daniel sighed. “If you finish before dinner, we can go out for ice cream later,” he offered.

“Okay!” They screamed in unison before racing each other up the stairs.

He shook his head. Those two were a handful already and Philip was only six and May was about to turn eight. It was only going to get worse from here as they got older.

“Daisy?” Daniel asked concernedly as he made his way over and plopped down on the couch next to her. “You alright, babe?”

She stared at him blankly, barely registering the look of worry on his face. “I saw him,” she whispered.

Daniel’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What? Who?”

Daisy inhaled deeply. _It was him. It had to be him_. “Coulson. I saw him today.”

If her husband was surprised, he didn’t show it. “It’s been almost 15 years for us, Dais. But he’s lived almost 50 years since we left him and May back in 2020.”

Why was Daniel not understanding this? “He’s an LMD. And I know what I saw.” _It was him._

“Did you speak to him?”

Daisy was getting angry now. “No. I saw him across the street from the grocery store. He was just standing there, and then after a few cars had passed he was lost in the crowd before I could get to him.”

“Did he acknowledge you at all?”

She shook her head. This conversation was getting her nowhere - Daniel obviously didn’t believe her or either thought she was losing her mind.

“I’ll prove it,” Daisy said, pushing herself to her feet quickly and going to track down her laptop from wherever Philip had left it. He was her brainy kid, always wanting to learn about history or science and spouting random facts to them over dinner, but May? She was not interested in using technology in the least, instead choosing to learn martial arts and playing sports. It was amazing how much both of her kids’ personalities reflected those of their namesakes.

Daniel followed her as she went on her quest, tearing the house apart. “Daisy….. come on. It’s not that I don’t believe you…. Daisy, just stop. Please.”

His words fell on deaf ears, and she finally found the computer shoved in the hideout the kids had created in the closet under the stairs.

“If he’s here, it can’t be good, Daniel.” She sat at the kitchen table, refusing to acknowledge the nagging feeling in the back of her mind that kept reminding her what it meant if Coulson was alone.

She opened the search engine and typed: _Melinda Qiaolian May, d.o.b. Nov. 20, 1966_.

Daisy steeled herself for whatever she might find. Being the member of the team to go furthest into the future, she knew the rest of the team had likely lived out their natural lives by this point, and so she had not dared to look for any of them, instead choosing to believe they had all gotten the happily ever afters they had deserved.

The results popped up immediately and Daisy quickly found the one she dreaded seeing. Tears filled her eyes as she started to read the obituary dated two days ago.

_Melinda Qiaolian May-Coulson, of Pittsburgh, PA, passed away in her home yesterday of natural causes at the age of 103…_

Daniel had seen the screen and began rubbing Daisy’s back comfortingly as she skimmed the page. Daisy knew most of the details of May’s accomplishments and important life events had been either changed or left out to keep Shield’s secrets, but there was no doubt the writing style had to have been Coulson’s. No one else would have described May with as much loving detail as he had. She finally reached the end of the article, and her breath caught in her throat.

_Mrs. Coulson is survived by her husband Phil, her daughter Skye (Dan), and two grandchildren, all of whom brought her the greatest joy one could imagine._

Daisy buried her face in Daniel’s chest and sobbed. “May…. She knew,” she managed to get out between a couple of shaky breaths. “Somehow she knew about the kids.”

“Between her and Coulson, are you surprised?” Daniel whispered.

Daisy gave a half-hearted chuckle. She really couldn’t be that surprised they had managed to keep tabs on them now that she thought about it.

“You know,” Daniel said with a gentle kiss to her temple, “I always thought they insisted on being left in 2020 so they would be able to keep up with you later.”

She just nodded, knowing in her heart that he was right.

* * *

Daisy had just gotten home from the gym and was rushing around trying to get some things done before the kids got home from their play date. Daniel had graciously offered to take them so she could have some time for herself that morning to recharge.

She may have been away from her Shield family for twice as long as she had had them, but the gym still held a sacred place in her heart and reminded her of her time with them. Today though, she had thought only of May as she had done her Tai Chi routine and had blinked away tears the whole time.

Mourning Melinda was harder this time around. It had taken Daisy almost a year to stop crying every night after their last mission as a team, missing her found family with every fiber of her being, but taking comfort in the fact that they would all be safe. Splitting up around the globe hadn’t been enough, so they scattered through time as well.

Now, it had only been a few days since she had read Melinda’s obituary but she was feeling a sense of loss she couldn’t put into words. There was nothing to justify this loss, and Daisy’s heart hurt knowing that the woman who had loved her unconditionally, who had helped her become the best version of herself, and who’s influence Daisy still felt on her daily life, was gone from this world.

She was the last of her team left alive.

Well, besides Coulson.

Speaking of, Daisy was now doubting whether she had seen Coulson at the grocery store. Maybe he had been a manifestation from her subconscious letting her know of Melinda’s passing. 

She sat heavily at the kitchen table, and put her head in her hands, pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes to fight off a fresh wave of tears threatening to overtake her.

A _k_ _nock, knock, knock_ came from the front door.

Daisy sighed. She did not need company right now.

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

“I’m coming!” she yelled with a roll of her eyes. It was probably her kids, home early from their play date, and knocking to purposely drive her crazy. They were learning about practical jokes but hadn’t quite grasped the concept yet.

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

She jerked the front door open, fully expecting to see her kids giggling at their so-called ‘joke’ on mom.

But it wasn’t her kids.

It was Phil Coulson, looking the same as he had when she left him in 2020, a small grin on his face. The smile didn’t quite reach his eyes though; there was a sadness behind them. “Hey, Dais.”

Daisy launched herself at him with such force, she was afraid they were going to fall off the front steps. “I knew it was you!” It felt so good to be back in his embrace, but while she’d missed him for 15 years, she knew he had missed her for 50.

“I’ve missed you so much.” He squeezed her tighter and added, “We both did.”

She nodded. “That’s why you’re here isn’t it? Because she’s gone?” 

“Can we go inside?” he asked softly. “I’ll explain, but I can’t stay long.”

They settled on the couch, Phil producing a bag she hadn’t noticed before.

“What’s that?” she asked, nodding to the bag.

Phil grinned at her. “As impatient as ever, aren’t you?” he teased.

Daisy shrugged, falling easily back into her old rhythm with him once again. It was like coming home again.

“Melinda wanted you to have this,” he said, pulling a familiar leather jacket out of the bag and placing it gently on Daisy’s lap. “She never let me stop taking care of this. She was insistent that one day you were going to get it.”

She nodded, caressing the soft, supple leather of the lapel. The jacket looked older than the last time she had seen it, still in good shape considering its age, but it was definitely vintage at this point.

“There’s also a letter in the pocket that she wrote for you.” He must’ve seen the surprise on her face, and continued with a small chuckle. “She stole the idea from me, you know.”

Daisy gave him a good-natured eye roll despite the tears threatening to fall from her eyes. Just like old times.

“And,” he tugged his wallet from his back pocket and handed her a photo he had pulled from within. “I made you a copy of this photo I took. Sorry we couldn’t get one with Philip, but her health wasn’t as good then.”

Puzzled, Daisy looked down, studying the photo. It was undoubtedly a photo of Melinda, she guessed it was fairly recent since May was pictured with mostly white hair, and many more lines on her face than Daisy had ever seen. And then she noticed, Melinda was holding a tiny bundle she recognized as a baby with jet black hair.

There was a lump forming in her throat. “Is that….?” Daisy managed.

“The two Mays in one photo? Yep. When we found out you were pregnant, Melinda told me she wanted to sign up to be one of the volunteers to cuddle babies in the hospital nursery. I tried to talk her out of it, but you know Melinda.... So she went through the 6 week application process, and finally got approved. We went to the hospital every day for almost a month waiting for you to go into labor.” He smiled fondly at the memory.

Daisy was listening with rapt attention. Melinda May, who had been in her 90s, made the trip from Pittsburgh to DC, just so she could have some secret time to snuggle with her granddaughter.

 _It was too much to handle_. Daisy had to switch gears or she was going to start crying yet again. And this time, she didn’t think she would stop.

“You guys had a good life then? You were happy?”

He nodded sadly. “Yeah. We were. It was bittersweet though. A lot of time was spent missing you guys. All of you.”

“Yeah,” she managed, forcing her words past the lump in her throat. _Damn it_. The tears were about to win.

Phil glanced at his watch. “Daisy, I’ve been here too long already. I don’t want to put you and your kids at risk.”

Daisy shook her head, still fighting back tears. “I’m not ready to let you go yet.”

He stood, looking as miserable as she felt. “I know. But I’ll be closer than you think.”

She wrapped him in another tight hug. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” With a last glance at her, he made his way to the door, but paused before leaving. “Oh. And I was supposed to let you know that you have to wear the jacket while you read the letter.”

* * *

It took her a month to work up the courage to open the letter from May. 

When she finally though she was ready, she pulled the jacket from her wardrobe and shrugged it on before she had a chance to talk herself out of it yet again. It still smelled like Daisy remembered – the mix of leather and lemon-ginger green tea and something she could never identify but she always associated with Melinda.

Somehow the jacket had made her feel closer to May. She had to admit, even after all this time, Melinda still knew how to comfort her, even If it was now from beyond the grave. Daisy opened the letter and began to read, almost able to hear it in May’s voice…

> Daisy,
> 
> Not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought of you. I’m sure you’d say the same of me if I asked, but I hope that’s not true. You have a future to build, beautiful children to raise. I’d feel guilty if I pulled even one second of your time away from them.
> 
> Damn. I’ve been with Phil for too many years – the tears are already falling and I think this letter is going to wax poetic. Forgive me.
> 
> I’m sure you’re expecting something a little less ‘touchy-feely,’ but I missed too many opportunities to tell you how much I loved you when I had the chance, so this will hopefully make up for those times. 
> 
> As our scientist friends liked to say, nothing in the universe is created and nothing is destroyed – just transformed. I’ll be the ocean breeze that catches you by surprise on your family vacations, that first drop of rain during a storm, the butterfly that lands on your kids’ noses… all the things in life that make you happy. (I told you – _poetic_ ).
> 
> If our team proved anything, it’s that time is not certain- it is not fixed. There’s still a time out there that we are together, all of us, still kicking ass and taking names on Z1. You’ve mourned me enough in your life - remember the good times, and know there aren’t enough words to tell you how much I’ve missed you and how immensely proud you’ve made me, first as your S.O. and mentor, then your colleague, and ultimately, your mother.
> 
> I love you. I have always loved you. I will always love you. 
> 
> \--Melinda

* * *

For the first time in years, Daisy dreamed of them all that night - May, Coulson, Jemma, Fitz, Yo-yo, and Mack - all together once again on the Zephyr. She was sandwiched comfortably between May and Coulson as Jemma and Fitz rambled on about some complicated science thing no one else understood.

“Hey, you ok?” May whispered to her after a moment.

“Yeah.” She gave May a big grin. “You know? You reminded me of something today.”

May chuckled. “And what was that?”

“Time’s not fixed; we’re still together somewhere,” she said simply.

May gave her a quizzical look.

Daisy wrapped May in a tight hug and sighed contentedly as Melinda reciprocated the embrace. “Don’t worry, May. You’ll explain it to me later.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for joining me for my emotional journey after 7x09. Let's all go cry together for the final 4 episodes, 'kay?


End file.
